On the morning of April 21, 2016 Prince Rogers Nelson died at his home in Minnesota. I spend a lot of time thinking about love and the effect it has on individuals and their relationships. It only made sense that after Prince died I thought about what I’ve learned about love from him.

Here’s what I learned about loving one’s self from his life:

Just do you.

A lot of people may be surprised that I’m a big Prince fan. I’m pretty traditional and lean towards conservative with regards to how I express myself. However, I always commend and champion the rights of people to be who they authentically are.

That’s what always appealed to me about Prince. He was who he was and he expected you to deal with it. When Prince would show up on stage in a ruffly, purple outfit, it didn’t strike me as proving a point so much as keeping it real. Everybody didn’t love him or get him and he didn’t really seem to care.

One has to be comfortable in one’s own skin to step unapologetically away from societal norms and be willing to accept the consequences of that decision. No matter how eccentric or conventional you are, there will always be people who want you to conform to what they think you ought to be.

You have to love yourself to withstand the scrutiny of others. Prince’s life and legacy teaches me that a willingness to stand out from the crowd makes room for the right people to enter your space.

It’s OK if who you are evolves.

Prince established his public persona in his early 20s as a sexually charged, gender-defying, musical virtuoso. He dropped the f-bomb in numerous tracks and even included it in the title of one of his most popular tunes.

Around the turn of the 21^st century Prince had a religious awakening that led him to be much more conservative. He stopped performing his raunchier songs in concert and encouraged those in his presence to refrain from swearing.

Though that was quite a shift, it didn’t really seem to affect his popularity. To me, the essence of what drew me to Prince was the same. He was still a fabulous musician who gave a great live show and was a little weird. It simply manifested in a slightly different way.

I felt the Bible-reading Prince of recent years was just as authentically him as the bare bummed version in the 1990s. It would actually strike me as kind of forced and unnatural had he remained the exact same in his 50s as he was in his 20s.

Some folks won’t want you to change once they think they have you figured out. They fail to acknowledge that the point of living is to continue growing and changing. You have to love yourself enough to be open to evolving regardless of who or what others expect you to be.

Know your worth so you can share your gifts on your own terms.

By all accounts, Prince loved making music and he wanted to share it when he wanted to share it. Early in his career that meant releasing singles practically every week, much to the chagrin of his record label. More recently, he fought with music streaming services and YouTube to limit the availability of his content.

Prince created the music and it bore his name so he wanted control of it. I’ve read articles about how he could have made more money by being more accommodating to outside entities. I’d argue that it’s not always about money. Sometimes it’s about autonomy.

The talent lay with him so Prince wasn’t really about having other folks tell him how to value himself. From what I read, Prince’s net worth was in the 9 figures even after giving away millions to charity so he seems to have done OK.

The world is full of people who will offer us less than we are worth and try to convince us we are lucky to get it. Whether in personal relationships or professional negotiations, devaluing will rear its ugly head to persuade you that it is unreasonable to ask for more in exchange for what you give.

Prince showed it is totally possible to love people, love what you do and love yourself enough to know your worth. When you know your own value, you make others rise to meet it rather than waiting for them to define your merit. I’d actually suggest existing with an appropriate sense of self-worth is essential to functioning with authentic love towards others.

Prince has embodied many things to many people over time. To me, at this time, he is a symbol of love. The ways he exhibited his love for himself during his fifty-seven years on earth inspires me. In my next post I’ll discuss what Prince’s death has reminded me about how to love others.

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Dr. Jattu Senesie is a life coach, speaker, personal trainer and retired obstetrician-gynecologist. She blogs about issues of self-care and well-being in an effort to help her fellow altruistic high achievers find the strength to be good to themselves.