This year I am calling for people to make a consistent investment into personal development.  In general, it seems we feel comfortable with allowing ourselves intermittent personal rewards but resist making real investments in bettering ourselves.

Our choices around time, money and effort reflect how much we truly value our own well-being.  Those of us with a heart for service are particularly challenged to give the same sustained effort to our own self-care as to care for our friends, family and clients.

We feel that any personally appropriated resources have to be earned and not just deserved outright. This leads to a system of rewarding ourselves instead of investing in ourselves. 

A lot of us readily spend time and money on our education, our families and even our homes but balk at doing the same with our personal development.  We think choosing ourselves is somehow self-indulgent and irresponsible.

The irony is that folks who are most concerned about being decadent are least likely to be so.  They fail to recognize that the personal trainer, cleaning lady or music lessons can be an essential part of the self-care necessary for an overall fulfilling life.

From my own experience, I can dispel one big fallacy about placing value on personal development.

It is not selfish to invest in one’s self.  It is self-aware. 

Prevention is a buzz word in health over the past decade.  We all hear that we need to eat healthy and get enough physical activity to stave off chronic disease.  Somehow that message gets muddled when it comes to day-to-day self-care activities.

We save up all our angst and stress to release it on a crazy girls’ weekend or fabulous romantic getaway.  Of course, if we set aside time regularly to call our friends or go on dates with our significant others we might not feel so stressed going into and coming out of those vacations.

Budgeting time, money and attention to cultivate relationships on a regular basis has a much more lasting effect than even the most extravagant holiday.  Pay for the babysitter so you and your partner can go out on regular dates.  Carve out time in your schedule to catch up with your closest friends.  Look away from all screens when you are having a conversation with a loved one.

Don’t turn happiness into a gift you give yourself for tolerating being miserable most of the time.  Strive for daily joy.

Another way we trick ourselves with rewards instead of investments is by treating ourselves to amazing self-help seminars, workshops and retreats.  There is nothing wrong with these events in themselves.

The problem is when we try to learn everything about living a balanced life in less than three days and hope that carries through the whole year.  Just in case you haven’t realized it yet, it takes more than one weekend to craft a satisfying life.

There has to be a sustained effort to get to and stay in a place of fulfillment.  Getting the tools isn’t helpful if they aren’t put into practice consistently.

Some folks reflect in their journals or meditate regularly.  Others have friends designated to hold them accountable.  Still others hire professionals to keep them on task and moving forward.

The key point is that some sort of investment (time, money, or effort) is essential to maintain the awareness required for adequate self-care.

When we take a step back and assess the big picture, it becomes clear the expense is worth it.  The resources that are used to care for one’s self end up serving the greater good of everyone.

As we start this new year, I encourage us all to consider how much value we are showing for ourselves based on where we allocate time, money and effort.  Recognize these resources are more than just a gift.  They are an investment in a better you.

Dr. Jattu Senesie is a coach, speaker, personal trainer and retired obstetrician-gynecologist. She blogs about issues of self-care and well-being in an effort to help her fellow overachieving do-gooders learn how to be good to themselves.

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