FAITH

I’ve been thinking a lot about faith the past few weeks.  Before you agnostics out there tune out I’m not talking about religious faith, although that plays into it for me personally.

I’m specifically talking about faith in one’s self.  Faith is the foundation of how we interact in the world.

The Bible says that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.  This explains why faith is so difficult to pull off.  Most of us like evidence, especially those of us with a STEM background.

When embarking on a new venture, it is reassuring to know I have done it or something like it in the past.  This gives me confidence.

I am fortunate to have had many personal and professional experiences from which to draw when I need a reminder of what I am capable of doing.  However, the true test of my faith comes when I fully commit to something I’ve never done nor really have any idea how to do.

I have to believe in the moment that everything is going to turn out fine in the end despite no data to support that conviction.  In fact, there may be multiple pieces of evidence to the contrary.

I used to think I had strong faith, but I’ve realized I was fooling myself.  In reality, I always stuck with activities I knew were within my skill set and thus didn’t stretch my faith.

School and medical training were challenging but I never thought I wasn’t able to do it.  I often questioned whether I really wanted to do it, but I always believed I could do it.

In contrast, my life outside of medicine has been one long exercise in faith.  When I resigned from my clinical job, I didn’t have another one or even a vague plan for next steps.

My entire life was designed for me to be an obstetrician-gynecologist so I had no clue how to transition.  I just started moving from where I was.

Since then, every move in the right direction has begun with a step into faith.  It seems going the unconventional route leads to progress and satisfaction for me.

Succumbing to fear, which is usually disguised as rational decision-making, either keeps me stuck in place or leads me down a false path.  The key is truly believing, without proof, that my spirit is leading me to be my best self.

Lest anyone think I’m so evolved I don’t ever get worried or question myself, let me assure you that is not true.  My inner control freak wants to confirm everything that is reasonably verifiable before I actually take that step of faith.

The issue is there is only so much research and pondering that is useful before action must be taken.  Eventually I have to decide if I believe in myself or I don’t.

The coolest thing about faith in myself is the peace that comes with it.  I release my stress, angst and worry about the unknown and just commit to what is in front of me.

This brings an inexplicable sense of assuredness about things I can’t prove.  Generally, when I am comfortable about a choice that almost everyone I know thinks is insane I’m in my sweet spot of faith.

Having faith in God does help me have faith in myself.  I trust that He has all the necessary information and intention to work everything out for my good.  That makes it easier to step into the void.

Believing in myself is no guarantee my life will work out exactly like I want.  However, it keeps me confident that I’ll be fine no matter the outcome.  When I reflect back, actions taken in bold faith have always led to my greatest sense of fulfillment and well-being.

Does your life reflect how much faith you have in yourself?  If so, is that a good thing?

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